Recently, through the swarm of social media that we have all come to expect in our daily news feeds, I found myself constantly being amused by the updates coming a recent acquaintance who resides in Dhaka, Bangladesh.
Haren is a Sri Lankan businessman, living in Dhaka. Other than hosting some really rocking parties, Haren has created a succinct Facebook log of updates which never fail to make me laugh out loud, or generally enjoy his astute honesty. With his permission, I’ve created a list of Haren Rishi Thadhani’s humorous takes on everything from Facebook to God via the devil, and women, in a perspective that is ultimately, very wise.
1. Don’t worry about what people think. They don’t do it that often.
2. “Come a little closer so I can push you away.” – women
3. The world will be a much better place if everybody took a chill pill. It would be even better if some of them choked on it.
4. If you drink enough, your brain starts photo-shopping people.
5. So, when people say “LOLZ”, does that mean they laughed themselves to sleep? Confused.
6. A naughty thought is a terrible thing to waste.
7. The road to hell is paved with everything that feels like heaven.
8. Dear Lord, if my happiness bothers some people, please give them their own happiness so they won’t bother hating on mine.
9. If you think someone is staring at you: 1.Yawn 2. If they yawn, they were staring.
10. Blessed are those who are cracked, for they are the ones who let in the light!
11. If you still talk about it, you still care about it.
12. Facebook, where people can pretend to be everything they really aren’t, to the friends they really don’t have.
13. I gave up on humanity when I picked up this friend’s phone and saw that my number was saved as “FREE FOOD.”
14. We keep running after people who least care about us! Why don’t we just stop, turn around, and see the ones running behind us?
15. JOKE OF THE YEAR: Two women were sitting quietly together, minding their own business.
16. Only foolish people are easily influenced by rumors spread by envious people.
17. Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone?
18. The phrase, “Don’t take this the wrong way” has a zero percent success rate.
19. People inspire you or they drain you. Pick them wisely.
20. People with a sense of humor are so much easier to talk to and get along with.
21. You know you’re drunk when you sit down on the toilet & try to put your seat-belt on.
22. Care less and you’ll stress less.
23. Only a few people care. The rest are just curious.
24. A good heart will always be happy for everyone. However, most of the time, a good heart gets hurt very badly because it expects only good things from others.
25. Yes there’s plenty of fish in the sea, but don’t forget about the sharks, seaweed, oil spills, toxic waste and the Somali pirates.
26. Only a few years ago, average parents had four children. Nowadays, the average child has four parents.
27. It doesn’t matter what people say about you. It matters what you’re going to do to them after they say it.
28. 90% of people will fake laugh when they don’t understand what someone said to them.
29. Alarm clocks: Because every morning should begin with a heart attack.
30. The devil asked the old man, “why aren’t you afraid of me?” The old man replied, “I’ve been married to your sister for 50 years!”
If you liked this post, you may also enjoy 9 Things Rocking Dhaka’s Streets Today, or 20 Ways to Survive Living in Dhaka While Loving Bangladesh.